Tuesday, March 18, 2008

why is Henry smiling?

In the news the other day was a story about a contractor that was caught flagrante delicato with a vacuum cleaner.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2008/03/03/nhoover103.xml

I say bad Henry!

He was caught naked and kneeling in front of Henry Hoover and claimed that he was vacuuming his trousers when a security guard stumbled on the amorous encounter. Now the thing that gets me is that how did it get to this point. Did the contractor see Henry’s smiling face and that oh-so-long-and-irresistible-proboscis and think naughty thoughts?

According to the manual, Henry Hoover is "famous for its looks, but under its fascia lies a powerful, reliable vacuum cleaner ready to go time and time again." See, there's the problem. Every day this contractor would hold onto Henry's vibrating throbbing hose and it would make suggestive sucking noises as he worked the floor. It's easy to see how one could get distracted into feelings of romantic intent. Henry would suck and swallow anything in it's path. No complaints, no spitting, no chocking. No requests for bling-bling. Time and time again. Just one smiling sucking machine.

If I was the judge, I would've absolved the contractor of all charges.

"Mutual nasal copulation, grounds for exoneration!"

2 comments:

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Anonymous said...

Too funny!